Christmas Magic

This past Christmas I visited my extended family in Michigan. I’ve been going to Michigan for holiday’s for years and for the most part they have been the same thing with new adornments as family members age. This one was somehow different. I sensed my self being in a strange form of limbo. Being on the edge of one world but not quite in the next.

The first “world” I speak of is the world of Christmas magic. The place where Santa Clause brings you big gifts, and the only thing you really worry about is how big those gifts are and how many you get to open. it’s a world of sparkle and shine, or at least enough to blind you from what is going on beneath the layer of wrapping paper surrounding you. When I was a child I seemed to imprint the concept of magic with my Father, whether it be because we would always watch magic shows together or perhaps it’s also because of this memory. I remember one Christmas spent in Michigan, when I was very young. We were at my Aunt’s house and being a small child with no siblings I went to my Dad for entertainment, after all he was the magic man. I can’t remember quite perfectly how it happened but we were playing and I think I asked him to do a magic trick. So with my stuffed animal in hand he tells me to close my eyes, I trustingly do so. He says some magic trick words and I open my eyes; Gasp! My toy is on the other side of the room! At that place in time I saw magic, my father had managed to make my toy transport form one side of the room to the other! I asked him to do it over and over and over again. Each one of those times being just as magical as the first.

Just recently I was thinking about this memory, and it quickly occurred to me that maybe his magic trick wasn’t filled so much with magic but more the ability to toss a toy from one end of the room to another. I felt so stupid for believing in that. How could I have been so naïve! Even at that age I was a quick to get it kid, not a ton of things could wiz past me without my realizing what was going on. But through my frustrated thoughts a began to realize maybe I now wish I could be more naïve. I wish I could see magic in every day things. I have always seen knowledge as power, and when ever possible I garble it up like Mama’s home cooked meals after being away from home for too long. But I feel I’ve realized that maybe even if knowledge is power, who says I have to be all powerful? Besides, those in power I feel maybe don’t get so much time to themselves, or at least not enough to stop and smell the roses.

So for this new year, I hope to remember to be more of a kid and find magic in anything I can. It may be difficult for my over rationalizing, control freakish, need to know everything mind, but I can at least give it a try.

Metaphysics and the Afterlife

I suppose that I feel there is some underlying essence so to speak that is within everything. Connecting things together allowing important events to happen in our lives. I wouldn't call it fate or destiny just a push in the right direction. As for an afterlife, I don't know how I feel about that. I would like to think there is a place after the here and now that allows for more experiences or whatever it is that anything that is not apart of our realm will do. unfortunately that thing that hangs out between my ears can be a cynic sometimes, so I see the afterlife as just a fluffy hope and a dream, something right on the edge of reality that you can't really be sure of, but wouldn't mind being apart of, but at the end of the day the bills have to be paid and you have to eat.

I forget what philosopher it was that I was reading (possibly a mixture of Descartes and... well someone else) but his idea of the metaphysical/afterlife I found to be an interesting perspective, and not to mention something I might consider myself. It had to do with the connection between the mind/soul and the physical body. It was thought by Descartes that they are completely separate entities and that one could survive without the specific other and that the mind/soul didn't need a physical form at all. From that the afterlife was considered to be a realm that mind/souls could exist without a physical form pondering who knows what and would be able to after a certain length of time to reenter the physical world and have all new experiences.

Zen and the Post Office

Today I had to mail some packages last minute for the holiday’s. I decided to get to the post office between the early morning rush and lunch thinking that perhaps I would be able to get in and out and move on with what I had to do. Naturally when I arrived at 10:10 am there was an enormous line at the post office. I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised but needless to say I wasn’t ecstatic to be waiting in such a line. I added myself to the end, set my packages down and began my wait. Of course I was forced into conversation with my fellow waiters, but after the classic pleasantries of conversation where finished I was left with my slowly moving packages and my thoughts. While waiting I came to the conclusion that this sort of act was more “Zen” than I predicted.

I feel that the most successful waiter would be mastered at the art of being perfectly patient, and always in control of emotions; never getting to anxious, flustered, angered or moody. They have the ability to stand at grace without becoming tired or exasperated . As I waited I tried to embody this type of “Zen” and to my surprise I found no difficulty in doing so. I thought about a number of things while I waited, like a women a met last year while dealing with the holiday post office line. She was an interesting lady to say the least. She had a neon orange jacket, a bright green Grinch hat on, what looked like a knitted mo-mo made sometime in the mid 60’s and stirrup spandex. She finished her look off with neon rainbows peace earrings and a giant gold peace sign pendant. She was at least in her mid 50’s to 60’s. I can’t remember what we talked about I remember her as a spunky, opinionated individual. I can’t say for sure if she had mastered the “Zen” of post office waiting but she definitely made a mark on me.

As my thoughts continued I realized that I was actually very relaxed. I suppose what this past semester has been, anything simple like waiting in a line would be a saving grace. I still found myself to be surprised at how relaxing it was. Simply left to my thoughts standing as a Buddhist monk thinking about nothing and everything. I came to the front of line faster than I thought I would and though I can’t say I was sad to be leaving this moment I feel it has made just another mark on my history. It was not just another line waited in but a moment of peace. Who would have thought that a moment of peace would be found in a post office on the busiest day of the year, surrounded by flustered anxious people.

Titles

The other day I got into a conversation with a good friend over the importance of titling art work. I realized in this conversation that I have yet to title any of my work though I have created hundreds of pieces. So now I have many questions to pose. Such as, does art need a title? Has all the work I have created actually been art if I can not conceive a title for it? How important is having a title for a piece? How can you approach a piece if it has no name? These are all questions I don't necessarily have the answers for, but am most certainly not looking for answers. I suppose the reason why I have never put farther thought into my work (other than naming it based off of subject matter) is because my work is created from emotions rather than words so putting a piece into words that was created from something beyond words seems improper. But now, after this conversation I am left with this need to "title" my work, but I have no idea where to start. I suppose through time, and thought I will learn, but right now it's something that eludes me.

A Beginning

Life can be such a strange thing, and for whatever reasons my life has brought me to this crossing where i feel the necessity to finally tell the world (aka the world wide web) what i think. To tell the world what my thoughts are and see what my philosophical discovery and what sort of impact my art will have on people. This is just the beginning, i feel, of great discovery for me. who know where this will take me :)